How to Get Your Twin Toddlers to Sleep All Night

Whatever the reason, if you are still struggling to get enough sleep with 1 or 2 year old twin toddlers, I’m here to tell you that it IS possible. Here are my 10 steps to getting your toddler twins on a great sleep routine.

Table of Contents

1. Set Realistic Expectations
2. Sleep Environment 
3. Get Up Around the Same Time Every Morning
4. Daytime Activity
5. Consider 1 Nap Instead of 2
6. Keep Them in Their Cribs
7. Consistent Bedtime Routine
8. Quick Checks
9. Stay Firm and Nurturing 
10. Be Gracious to Yourself

1. Set Realistic Expectations

After 1 year of age, your toddlers likely have a routine that they think is working great for them. Many parents of multiples end up adopting so called “bad habits” when it comes to sleep. As a fellow twin mom myself, I really understand why twin parents are especially likely to have sleep issues. I thought I was tired with my single baby, but when my twin babies came along, I truly learned the meaning of exhausted. 

Are your toddlers co-sleeping with you and your partner? They probably think this is great and don’t realize that they would be getting much better rest in their own cribs. They don’t understand that this would help them to feel happier and better rested throughout the day, not to mention having happier and well rested parents! 

Maybe they fall asleep while being rocked or fed a bottle to sleep. This probably worked really well for you all during the early days with twins. Maybe it’s what helped you get through some of those sleep regressions or illnesses. Whatever the case, most twin parents end up developing these habits at some point. Giving your twin toddlers the skills to fall back to sleep on their own will be such a gift to them and to you. 

Realistically, your twins may not be very impressed with their new sleeping arrangements at first, but establishing healthy sleep habits is going to pay off in the long run. Crying and protesting is something you will want to to prepare yourself for in the first few days of sleep training twins. Decide ahead of time how much crying you are comfortable with and know that you can always adjust this to meet your and your twins’ needs. Even gentle approaches to sleep training can result in crying. I want you to know that you can still be a gentle parent and set firm boundaries when it comes to learning new sleep skills. You’ve totally got this. 

2. Sleep Environment 

Most twin families plan to have their twins sleep in the same bedroom for at least a few years in the beginning. At nearly 9 years old, my twins are still sharing a room with no end in sight. At this point, I don’t think they would be able to sleep in separate rooms even if we had the space! If you think that it will work best for your family to have your twins in their own rooms, this might be a great age to start. 

As 1-2 year old toddlers, your twins are still likely to be in cribs. Think about how you to best arrange 2 separate cribs. If you have a small space, placing them in an L shape is probably your best fit, however, they can tend to wake each other up easier.  If there is any way that you can separate the cribs even a little bit, it’s going to make a difference in how much they can mess with each other and keep each other awake. Maybe you can’t have the cribs across the room from each other, but try to give enough space so that your toddlers can’t touch their sibling. 

White noise is still going to be an important part of your twins’ room in the toddler years. You can use a fan or sound machine such as the Hatch or Dohm, or try a combo of both. Use the white noise for both nighttime sleep and naps. Make sure to secure any cords or fans out of the reach of your toddlers. 

Black out curtains are one of the most important things to maximize your twins’ sleep time.  

Lastly, consider using a sleep sack or wearable blanket for your toddlers. This will help them to signal that it’s time to lie down and rest, and also restrict some movement. If you have a a particularly clever child, you can put it on them backwards so that they aren’t able to easily unzip it. Make sure to consider their ideal body temperatures and get lightweight ones for warm weather and fleece for winter. 

3. Get Up Around the Same Time Every Morning

Yes, that goes for weekends and holidays as well. Even if it means everyone is hanging out in their pajamas all morning, get your toddlers out of bed. Once you on a good routine and your twins are sleeping through the night, it’s possible to think about the 80/20 rule, which just means that 80% of the time you are very consistent with wake times and 20% of the time you are more relaxed with them. But this rule should only be applied once your babies have good sleeping patterns. 

4. Daytime Activity

Your toddlers need to have a full tank at the end of the day in order to achieve sleep success. Make sure they are getting lots of stimulating activity throughout the day that doesn’t involve screens. Focus on independent play, reading books, simple crafts and actvities, and getting outside. Being outside helps with production of melatonin which is important for healthy sleep patterns. I live in Minnesota where we can have extreme weather, but even just 20-30 minutes on a walk can help regulate night sleep.

Most importantly, toddlers need to feel connected to their caregivers and family. Put your phone away (like in another room, not in your pocket), turn off the TV and play a game together. Have a tickle fight, play catch, read books, include them in setting the table for dinner, or have them make you a cup of pretend coffee with their plastic dishes. Expensive toys or elaborately planned activities are great, but deep connection is what your child truly wants from you. Coloring a piece of scratch paper together or using a cardboard box as a pretend car is far more meaningful than anything you can buy. 

5. Consider 1 Nap Instead of 2

If your little ones struggle to wind down at nap time, are napping less than 30 minutes, or are having trouble at bedtime, it might be time to transition to a 1 nap schedule. I know this can seem daunting, especially with two toddlers running around. But many twin parents find that their toddlers will actually get longer stretches of daytime and nighttime sleep with 1 consistent nap. 

After 18 months, most toddlers do best with wake windows between 5-7 hours. I have found that for whatever reason, toddlers seem to prefer 5 hours of awake time in the morning, and closer to 6 hours in the afternoon. Their total sleep for a 24 hour period should end up having somewhere between 11-14 hours of sleep. 

6. Keep Them in Their Cribs

Once your tots are climbing out of their cribs, it’s time to transition them to toddler beds to prevent injury. However, keeping them in their cribs for as long as possible is going to help everyone sleep better. The best way do this is to keep a sleep sack on your twins for every nap and every bedtime. Put it on backwards if they are able to unzip it. Lightweight sacks are a great option as they provide movement restriction without overheating. 

Also make sure the crib mattress is in the lowest setting and remove anything your child might be able to stand on to make it easier to get out. This could be a crib bumper, a stuffed animal, or a pillow. These things aren’t generally recommended for safe sleep anyway, so it’s a good idea to remove them. 

7. Consistent Bedtime Routine

Ideally, your toddlers should be laying down in their cribs ready for sleep between 7 and 8pm. That means that the bedtime routine should start about 20-40 minutes before that. When dinner and playtime are over, start your bedtime routine with giving your toddlers their milk. Sippy cups are preferred over bottles after a year of age, and breastfeeding at this point is still very beneficial if that is something that you choose to continue. Ideally, their bedtime milk is given in the living room, or anywhere that is NOT in their bedroom. 

After milk, it’s time for hygiene. This could be a quick face and hand wash or a full bath. It’s also important to start brushing their teeth at this point.  

Change into pajamas and clean diapers

Read a story or recite a few nursery rhymes 

Put on sleep sacks

Give hugs and kisses and lay your toddlers in their cribs

Say a key phrase such as “it’s sleepy time now.” 

turn off the lights, turn on white noise, and leave the room

8. Quick Checks

Generally speaking, toddlers will learn to sleep on their own faster and more consistently with a Quick Check sleep training method. How it works: 

Decide ahead of time how long you are comfortable with your twins crying. 

Accept that one twin will likely wake or disturb the other twin if they are sharing a room. Although it will be more challenging at first, in the long run, this will actually help bothe babies learn how to sleep better and ignore their sibling’s noises. 

After the bedtime routine is done and your twins are in their cribs, wait OUTSIDE their room for your predetermined amount of time. Set a timer. 

When the time has passed and they are still crying or upset, go in and give each one a Quick Check. You can decide how much you want to interact with your twins. It could be a visual check, verbal reassurance, a gentle pat on the back, you can even pick them up and give a hug if you feel they need it. This should be QUICK. 

After the check, walk back out. 

Repeat as many times as needed and for any middle of the night wakings before 6am. 

The goal is that they would fall asleep without being rocked, held, or fed to sleep. 

9. Stay Firm and Nurturing 

Keep your boundaries around sleep with your toddlers while still maintaining your special bond with them. You can be both firm and loving at the same time with your children. Saying “no more” to co sleeping or feeding to sleep might feel shocking to your toddler if that has been their experience, but you can walk them through it in a loving way. Stay calm and connected, try to be as patient as possible with them and yourself as you both make these changes in your sleeping habits. 

10. Be Gracious to Yourself

Having twin toddlers is not for the faint of heart. It is a challenging and trying time for every parent of multiples. Try to give yourself as much grace as possible and work as a team with your partner. Your toddlers think the world of you and if they could, they would tell you that you are doing an awesome job as their parent and to be patient with yourself. 

I hope this information is helpful to you and that you will be getting a great night’s sleep soon! If you are still struggling with sleep, please reach out for a consultation with me and let’s figure this out together.